At some point, every couple that has walked in the doors of Darkness Falls Counseling has cited "communication" as the vehicle for ruination. I've learned that "poor communication" has unending definitions.
There can be just as many consequences. Infidelity (emotional and/or Physical), isolation, constant arguing, threats of divorce, parenting differences, and our spouse becoming the equivalent of a roommate are but a few.
- Do you two share the same favorite color? Do you both believe Gary Allan is the man with a guitar? Do you both embrace the romanticism of baseball? Do you both find wonder in the taste of tofu and hummus?
Chances are at least one of those answers is "no." Chances are also quite sporting that you both are not always speaking the same language.
Can you read a book that is in a language you have no fluency in, then author a report? If not, then how can you judge each other on communication?
Many couples have thrown the relationship into auto-pilot.
"We have jobs/careers. . .we have children. . .we have our financial obligations."
Fair enough. At some point we need to decide the priority of our relationship, though. What is the rest of it worth without our spouse?
There is no clock on a marriage. As long as two people are willing, there still exists the opportunity for growth. What's the next step?